I have had some wonderful travel experience over the years, but who wants to hear about those? So, here’s a few of my most memorable for the wrong reasons.
Neckties: I had the opportunity to travel with my husband on a business trip to Taiwan. Every day we walked 10 yards from the hotel to a waiting bus, then 10 yards from the bus to a government building and returned late at night to be escorted the 10 yards from the bus to the hotel. I was never sure if we were guests or prisoners. I hear it is a beautiful country and, hey, I’ll never forget those great bus drivers.
Nausea: We took a cruise once to…Good Lord I don’t even know where we went because I spent the entire cruise inside our cabin puking my guts out.
“Whoa! Did you feel that?” I grabbed my husband’s arm as my knees buckled.
Things went downhill quickly after that. Yes, I did take Dramamine but, being the delicate flower that I am, I contracted a rare side effect of diplopia so even when I was able to stand up I got nauseous from double vision.
There’s a reason God placed me smack dab in the middle of a giant continent. I plan to keep my feet planted firmly on the ground from now on, thank you very much.
Nudists: After the all-inclusive cruise didn’t work out we tried the all-inclusive resort. We traveled to Jamaica where our hotel’s front desk clerk informed us we’d be staying on the clothing-optional side of the resort. No problem for someone as flexible as me, right? Okay, I did stop and pick up a dozen towels along the way to our room. No way was I going to sit on any of that furniture. Who knows how many bare butts had been there first!
They showed us to our room and I stepped out on the balcony. There was a beautiful view of the beach, which was covered in naked people of all shapes and sizes. At that very moment the heavens opened up and it began to rain – which caused all the naked people of every shape and size – to run for their rooms.
There were body parts jumping and bumping in every direction. “Ack! My eyes! My eyes!” I screamed.
I fell back on the couch which I had not yet draped in towels. I leapt up and ran to the bathroom to scrub myself from head to toe.
I’ll bet you wish you could travel with me sometime, right?