Although I don’t do much cursing myself I am an excellent translator. For example, at my corporate job.
Big Boss might say on his way out the door, “Call that M!@#$r F!@#$%g Frank and tell him he better have the G#$ D!@* report on my desk when I get here in the morning.”
Here’s how that message gets translated by me to Frank. “Hi, Frank. Big Boss asked me to call and see how your wife is doing after her surgery. He knows you’ve been overwhelmed so said it would be okay for you to have the report to him tomorrow morning.”
Or when meeting my older brother at a new location he’s likely to say “Hey, Bonehead! How many *!@#$$%& wrong turns did you make along the way?”
Some people might be upset, but not me because I know what he’s really saying is, “I’m so glad to see you. I was afraid you got lost.”
Personally though, I just can’t seem to curse. I even have trouble writing about cursing. I’m working on a novel and the main character has had a horrendous day. Problem on top of problem comes her way and her life is a mess. She’s been at the emergency room dealing with a sick relative. She leaves the hospital late at night. It’s been snowing all day and she has trouble finding her car. She’s digging around in the glovebox searching for a scraper because her windshield is covered in ice. What dialog did I write for her? “Where’s that darn scraper?”
Fortunately, I am a member of an amazing critique group and they offered up all kinds of alternatives for darn, like “Where’s the god-damned scraper?” And, “Where’s the mother-fucking scraper?” Or, “Where’s the god-damned mother-fucking scraper?”
I’m not sure I’ll be able to take that big of leap onto the cursing train, but I’m willing to give it a try. Do you think “fiddlesticks” is too strong of a word?