Category Archives: Dad – as in “You’re Dad was quite a character!”

Hurts So Good

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I’ve had my head bent over my computer for…well, for way too long now, trying to get to the end of my novel.  YIPEE! – –  I got to the end.  CRAP! – – now I’m back at the beginning.

All WTF Critique group members agree – the story doesn’t open in the right place.  I’m starting to think this writer’s gig is not all it’s cracked up to be.

Because I’ve barely left my computer lately, I haven’t been out in the world enough to add a new Crazie Town event so I’m doing the next best thing…posting an excerpt from my book – Also named Crazie Town.  Just in case you’re getting confused, my blog is true, my book is not — mostly not — okay, it mostly is.

Here’s a true event that I included in the book.  My dad (Max Grosskopf in this story) slipped and fell at his farm.  I (Genny in this story) managed to push, pull and prod his large body into my car and drive him to the emergency room.

A woman in a white lab coat walked into the room carrying Max’s X-ray.  She slid it into the slot on the light box and flipped the switch.

“It looks like a broken ankle to me,” she said.

“Really?  Are you sure?” Max asked.  “Maybe we should wait to hear what the doctor says.”

“Mr. Grosskopf, I am your doctor.  I’m Dr. Morris.”

Max sat back in the wheelchair and stuck his hands out in front of him. “Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.  No one ever asked me if I wanted a girl doctor.”

“What?”

“I’m just saying, they should have you fill out a form or something saying you agree to be treated by a girl doctor.”

Genny thumped her head with her palm.

Dr. Morris frowned and through clenched teeth said “I’m the only doctor available right now, Mr. Grosskopf, and even though I’m only a girl, I’m sure I can manage to put a cast on your little broken ankle.”

“Is this going to hurt?” Max asked.

“Certainly more than it needs to,” Dr. Morris said and walked out of the room.

I know you are, but what am I?

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Future Character

My dad was a certified Eccentric Character. A title he wore proudly. When I think of him, a little slideshow of images flash through my mind.

A young version of Dad walking into my first job.  He wore a pair of Buddy Holly type glasses but the thick black side pieces were on the outside of his ears, because “they hurt my head.”  He just smiled and waved at me as I tried to hide.

An older, much fatter, version of Dad.  My husband and I were sitting in the living room watching TV.  Dad walked out of his bedroom wearing only a t-shirt and briefs, but held a tiny hand towel in front of his chest for modesty.  He smiled and waved.

These antics of his used to embarrass me to no end.  But, I’ve begun to notice, I’m not that unlike him after all.

Current Character

Here I am in New York, staying at my brother’s apartment. He was out of town and kindly allowed me to use his place as a writing retreat. He lives in a beautiful loft with 8 foot windows. It was late and I was cold, because the window in front of me wouldn’t quite close all the way. In the outfit you see before you, I climbed up on the windowsill, and like a flannel-clad Spiderwoman, edged my way from one end of the wall of windows, to the other. Plastered against the glass, struggling to get the window to close, I looked up to see the people in the apartment building across the street watching me.   I smiled and waved.

Earlier this week I stepped out my car at the gym and realized I’d forgotten to change my shoes.  I still had on my fuzzy bedroom slippers.  I thought about going back home to change but then said, “Oh well.”  I rode the stationery bike which faces the running track. Each time someone rounded the corner they stumbled a bit as they stared at me.  I smiled and waved.

Yes, Family, it’s true.  I have stepped onto the slippery slope of Eccentric Characterdom.  Be afraid, be very afraid.